Top 10 Video Game Heroes

Timeout.

Before we get down to the business of naming my favorite game ever, let's shower you with top tens. I've made up eight of them, and I'll be sharing them over the course of the next week. The number one game and moment will be posted on Saturday. Until then... LISTS. Because LISTS.

This one is surprisingly by the numbers. Not much in the way of obscurities. I wasn't going to include them for the sake of including them. They consist of my ten favorite video game heroes. Some have good writing, some are just enjoyable characters, some are just sort of iconic.

Without further ado... My top ten video game protagonists (leading roles only, supporting characters come later).

10. Master Chief
Halo Series

Not exactly the most talkative guy around, sure. It could be argued that he's fairly overrated (I wouldn't argue with that, I suppose, anyone who's met an overly enthusiastic Halo fan knows how they get). What gets me is the absolute assurance that he's going to succeed.

Launching through space toward an enemy ship while strapped to a bomb? Sure.
Shooting his way through about seven billion parasitic zombie-likes to reach his objective? He'll do it.
Wage a one man war on two huge fronts? No problem.

He says that he'll do it (often in an understated, yet badass way), and that's that. It gets done.


9. JC Denton
Deus Ex

The game's script reads like a conspiracy theorist's wet dream, but the augmented Mr. Denton does a good job of keeping it grounded. A lot of the dialog sounds kind of silly in retrospect, and he gets a little "author tract"ish in places, but the character of JC Denton is still pretty damned top notch.

8. Tidus
Final Fantasy X

It would've been so easy to make Tidus just another one of the "young disillusioned dude saves the world" archetype clones that Final Fantasy games seem to have in no short supply, but Tidus is different. When you first meet him, he's brash, impulsive, and rude... and immature to the nth degree. Whereas most of the series' protagonists would have made only small, vague steps toward maturity, by the end of Final Fantasy X, it's clear that Tidus is not the same character he was in the beginning. The bittersweet ending only cements the growth.

7. Sora
Kingdom Hearts series

The plotline of the series is nigh incomprehensible, and mostly only exists to tie in a bunch of fun gameplay in various different mythoses, but Sora remains steadfast through the whole thing. I don't even know why, but once his character comes back into focus in the second game, I knew: So help me, I like this character.

6. Cloud Strife
Final Fantasy VII

Ugh. I know. The whole amnesia thing, the massive angst-fest that follows him everywhere. The hair.

The dude is just so badass toward the end of the game game (after he gets his head put back on right). I can't help it.

5. Razputin
Psychonauts

I should really give this game another try, I think. Everything that this character says is golden. He takes everything in stride, while trying to provide order to people who wouldn't know the meaning of order. He's the straight man in a world where straight men practically cannot exist.

Rather than go on and on, I'll just provide an out of context quote from one of my favorite sequences in the game:

Den Mother: Enough! It's time for me to pluck out your eyes!

Razputin: HA! You can't. That is the purpose of the goggles!

4. Mario
Super Mario series

Eatin' shrooms, savin' princesses...

3. Naked Snake
Metal Gear Solid III

I originally had Solid Snake on here, and I guess it really doesn't matter which is on here (ya know... clones and all), but I like the character progression with Naked Snake more. The development he goes through from the naive beginning to the cynical and crushing ending it much more interesting than a series of treatises on nuclear war and the definition of a modern soldier. The ending leaves little doubt as to why this character is about to go off the deep end. I'd gladly follow him there. Also, it's easily David Hayter's best performance.

2. Commander Shepard
Mass Effect series

It's a little bit of a cheat, since you can essentially create Shepard to be anyone you want (male or female, pushover nice guy or stone faced jerkass), but no matter which path you choose, the voice acting is superb, and the guy (or gal, if you prefer) can give a hell of a rousing speech.

...plus there's that whole "take on an ancient race of killer machines and win multiple times" thing. That doesn't hurt.

1. John Marston
Red Dead Redemption

'Layered' doesn't begin to describe it. Without heading too far down the unmarked spoilers path, Marston is the most interesting character I've seen in a video game. He's a loyal helper, but he's got scars on his psyche as deep as the ones on his face. He's a devoted family man and a cold blooded killer on the same token. Every time he speaks, people pay attention. The scenes toward the end of the game, once the goals have been achieved are absolutely wonderful. Props to everyone involved in making this character come alive. I hope to see more like him in the future.

Top 50 Video Games: Number 2

Platform: SNES

Absurdly Specific Genre: Emsemble cast, the RPG

Difficulty: 5 (there's a couple of fights that pack a bit of punch, but it's nothing too crazy)

Beaten: Yes

It's only now that I realize the grave error I've made in my top 50 moments list. That list is, by its very nature, more nostalgic and prone to be swayed by how I felt during the moment as it occurred. With that in mind, how on earth did I miss the introductory cutscene to this game? It's cinematic as all get out - with the three mechs overlooking the town and then making the slow walk in the snow. It's a top 30 moment for sure, and I blew it.

Maybe that's because the rest of the game does such a good job of making sure that it never lets up on the powerful moments. From  poisoning of Doma to Cyan's (all too brief) reunion with his family to the mildly terrifying first encounter with Atma/Ultima ("Feeble creatures... GO!" and the chilling boss music that plays) to the finale, when Kefka admits that at his core, he's not homicidal, he's omnicidal he just wants the whole world to burn.

Laughing all the way.

The story is epic. The music is epic - it's probably Nobuo Uematsu's best work (the way the boss theme breaks into play in any of the many times that a boss sneaks up on you is lots of fun). The characters are all rich and varied (lots of archetypes from previous Final Fantasy games, but lots of new ones, as well). 

The game itself plays beautifully, and though the second half doesn't quite live up to the first half (I always chose not to abuse the vanish/x-zone glitch, and I only taught one character Ultima, since I generally try to keep things on a non-lame level), it still has plenty of memorable parts while you get the team all back together for the final assault. I actually liked the fact that you had to split the party in three for that final attack, since I'm generally the kind of guy who likes to use all kinds of different characters, anyway.

Except Strago. Fuck that old brainwashed coot.

All of it adds up to a game that is the best game that isn't the best game ever. I play through the whole thing every couple of years, and I always find it to be a joyful, fresh experience. RPGs have gotten bigger and prettier and more complex (one last dig at the goofypants Final Fantasy XIII story, I mean, that shit was just weird). They've never topped this one. I sort of doubt they ever will.

Other Notable Final Fantasy games:

I started a new run of Final Fantasy I well after I had solidified the list, and I'm finding it to be a lot of fun. Probably not top 50 fun, but it's still a pleasant surprise.

I get Final Fantasy IV and V confused in my head a lot. It probably means I should give them both a replay. I'm thinking of starting with V, since it's been longer since I played through that one.

I'm trying to remember ever having played II or III. I can't remember details on either. Are they good?

Top 50 Video Game Moments: Number 2

I love the Portal series. You should know that by now. Portal 2 has, in my opinion, the best ending to any video game I've ever played.

You could read on not having played Portal 2, but that would be ridiculous. The game  is great. Just go buy it.

Top 50 Video Games: Number 3

Platform: NES

Absurdly Specific Genre: Eatin' shrooms, savin' princesses...

Difficulty: 7 (if you argue for any less, you've been playing the first few worldsnot enough of that 8th world)

Beaten: Yes - probably a dozen times

This is the best platformer ever made.

I expect there to be some dissent on that particular claim, but this isn't as tied into nostalgia as one might think. Sure, there was that week or two that one summer that my brother and I awoke every morning before dawn to squeeze in a bit of time with this game - that's not an insignificant part of why I love it. Really, though, consider this...

• * There is no more precise platform game in existence . When you want to move left, you move left, when you want to jump, it happens.
• * The graphics are about as pe to conjure, and still look crisp to this day.
• * The music, while maybe not quite as classic as the original overworld theme, is still catchy and memorable.
• * The worlds are all varied, as are the variety of weird and wonderful powerups.
• * This is the game where series mainstays like a World Map, the Leaf, and my favorite... Boos.

Also. Kuriboh's Shoe. The most lethal shoe since the infamous shoe-knife.

The difficulty curve was just about perfectly paced. Early levels could be mastered by relative newbies, while later levels give me fits to this day (8-2 still me throw the occasional controller).

There's room for plenty of debate when it comes to the best game in the series. SMB2 just missed out on the top 15, the original is an absolute classic (though maybe not one that I play on a very consistent basis, as the fact that you can't change direction in midair drives me up a wall). The newer 3D offerings are tremendous games in their own right (though I haven't played a whole lot of the Galaxy series, and I don't know why). Even the new co-op game (New Super Mario Brothers Wii) is miles ahead of most platformers. The series just doesn't seem to have any room for failure (though I'll go to my grave saying that Super Mario 64 is by leaps and bounds the worst of the series), but for my money, Super Mario Brothers 3 comes out on top.

Top 50 Video Game Moments: Number 3

Only three moments to go. Now for the ultimate in video game twists.

The game is Bioshock. Don't read if you plan to play it sometime - you will ruin a very integral part of the plot.

If you've played the game, you already know what I'm talking about. Let's do this.