Vogons be killin' it.
The old standby where you're given a response, and asked to sculpt a question around it. We got 20 of the 38 possible points. Well done, team.
These were my contributions.
It’s no surprise they melted, then.
-Man, I sure goofed on the kids’ birthday present – instead of the Playskool Noah’s Ark, I got them the Ark of the Covenant.
I wasn't actually sure how this one would go over. I knew I wanted an Ark of the Covenant joke, but didn't know how to phrase it. This is the first draft. I'm glad I didn't work it down any more. Both judges picked it.
You could get the same result by banging a bunch of pots and pans together.
-My third grader’s band is going to be in the school’s talent show, do you want to watch?
I like this one better than the obvious Nickeback joke. They are to music what Two and a Half Men is to television. Not very good, either way. I would've picked the 2004 election one over both of them.
That’s an unlikely use of your theater degree.
-It’s time to make some money, bitches!
My last minute contribution. Picked by both.
I wanted to go because they have the hottest chicks.
-Why did you vacation at Death Valley Hatcheries?
Weirdly, everyone went with the "warm baby chickens" route. Mine got picked by both judges.
A couple extra notes.
* We're lucky that we didn't go with mine for the "going so well until he slipped" one, because both other teams went the circumcision route.
* I still like my question for "A slide rule, an apple and a piece of the Blarneystone", which was, of course, "I give up, what would an Irish Isaac Newton carry on him at all times?"