Nibbishment

Spookymilk Survivor X: Unfortunate Strength

2012-01-30T09:09:00.000-06:00

Vogons need to vogon over the next two weeks. Can they do it? Can I snag some sweet scores in the process? Read on, my friends.

This week's challenge was "Unfortunate Strength". The only requirement was that the protagonist had to have a strength that had drawbacks. A broad category, to be sure, but it had lots of potential. Did I live up to that potential? Did Vogons? Let's find out together.

My entry:

“I’m sorry to bother you…” the frail woman began. They were always sorry. They were usually scared, too, but mostly, they were just apologetic. Sorry to inconvenience, sorry to impose, so sorry to place the burden on Christine. If they were really so sorry, she thought, they wouldn’t be asking. They’d be looking into aromatherapy or herbal treatments – anything but this.

“You do understand what you’re asking for, don’t you?” Christine cut the woman off. “Can you live with what’s going to happen?”

They always, without fail, said that yes, they could live with it. Some of them actually could. Maybe they just didn’t understand the nature of the Balance, or maybe they understood it, but simply didn’t care what about the implications.

“Gather up a couple of Frank’s personal effects and procure a single vial of his blood. Bring those things to me three nights from now. You’ll need to spend that night in this house, so bring along a change of clothes.”

Some of Christine’s clients would then begin to worry about how they were going to get a vial of blood without their loved one suspecting anything. Some of them began to realize the full weight of what they were asking for around this time. If this woman did, she resigned herself to it with a sigh and a weary nod. They made their arrangements and the woman left.

Thursday came, and Christine set the basement up for the ritual. The woman came over at the appointed time and the pair went descended into the darkness.

“Do you ever feel badly for what you do?” the woman asked. Christine loathed conversations like this. What they about to do was soul-wrenching enough as it was without having a great deal of attention cast upon the particulars of it.

“I generally don’t think about it too much. If you’re ready, we ought to begin.”

“Why do you do it? You didn’t ask for much money, and you can’t possibly enjoy the heartache your actions cost.”

Christine opened her mouth to reply, but couldn’t find the words for an explanation. This woman was just as complicit as she, what was there to be gained from discussing it further?

“I don’t think we should talk about this any more.”

“I just don’t see how a human could…”

“Enough. Do you have the items I requested?”

“Yes.”

“Then if you have nothing further to say, let’s begin. I will transfer your husband’s illness into this loaf of bread. Whichever eats the bread will take on his illness.”

“Alright.”

The ritual was completed with no further incident. Christine gave the woman the cursed loaf of bread, instructed her that the sooner she found a target, the more effective the transference would be.

The woman nodded, she took the bread out of her purse and began to eat it.

Christine stared in disbelief as the woman took the curse upon herself.

“Why did you do that?” Christine asked. She had entertained a suspicion that others had done similar things throughout her time, but never had she seen a client do so in person.

“I couldn’t bear to see him slip away.”

“But you’ll force him to do it for you?”

“No.” replied the woman, as she briefly showed Christine the pistol she had hidden in her purse. With that, she left.

The next day, Christine’s new client was sitting at her table. “I’m sorry to bother you” he began…

No, Christine thought, you’re not, and after this time, I won’t have to be, either.

Here's what our fair judges thought.

K: Wow, another fable. Don’t play God, people. I like the concept and would like to see it extrapolated further, though it does seem somewhat familiar. 4

DK: Another good idea (these are all pretty good ideas) but something about it played out a little too familiar for me. It didn’t really grab me and keep me interested like some of the others. 2

My initial concept when I first read the outline of the challenge was the idea of a doctor who's too good at hopeless cases, and is constantly being saddled with no hope cases. This was discarded, because the story that was coming together was weirdly devoid of any sort of humanity (just as well, in retrospect, it reads kind of - like Beau said - a bad episode of House).

The sort of vague witch doctor-y thing I came up with didn't come together quite like I'd hoped, particularly the ending. I like the last sentence, but the lead in felt like it was lacking. I couldn't figure out exactly what that lack might be, but it felt flat-ish.

I have to believe that when both judges said it felt 'familiar' they were talking about the Stephen King story Thinner? Maybe? I dunno. They both said it, though, so that, combined with the 'changing horses midstream' nature of my entry this week makes me think that I might have unconsciously cribbed a plot detail from some other work. I'll have to be more careful about that in the future.

Regardless, not only did Vogons not have to eliminate anyone, they vogoned all over the place, with a snazzy 3.2 average.

Spookymilk Survivor X: Struggling With Decline

2012-01-23T08:50:00.002-06:00

Last week, Vogons lost another member. This distressing turn of events was brought to you by JG (R.I.P.). Moving on...

This week, the concept was a struggle with decline. Make a story where the protagonist is having issues with declining... something. Could be physical, could be mental, could be metaphysical - doesn't matter. So long as somebody's struggling with the fact that something isn't what it was.

Here's mine.

I have seen so much in my time.

I’ve witnessed countless civilizations rise and fall. I’ve seen the far reaches of what a million generations deemed the edges of existence, and light years beyond them. I’ve watched creation itself burst forth with sights to glorious to imagine, only to wither and die when its season was through.

That was in eternity past. It’s been so long since the warmth that I can scarcely remember it. All that remains now is darkness and a cold that permeates everything. There is nothing left to see, and my seemingly eternal life has finally been spent.

It is finally time.

Gathering what precious little energy I have left, I prepare myself. My death will be the gateway to the birth of a new creation.

“Let there be light.”

And here's the judges' critiques...

K: I love the twist, and the length, I think, for this story is correct. However, because this week was so damned strong, an incredibly clever premise that’s over quickly just can’t hold up to some of the emotional resonance we’ve had to this point. 2

DK: I’m not going to say it’s too short, cause it’s not. It sells what it sets out to sell in an effective amount of space, but it doesn’t really draw me into its protagonist or the circumstances like a lot of the others here do. 2

I'm shocked that I got twos. I really thought I was getting worse than that for this one. I think this is my worst submission of the year. I liked the concept, but tinkering around with it all week, I couldn't find a way to make it resonate. DK isn't wrong here, there's no draw, no reason for the reader to care one way or the other. It's all concept and the twist at the end.

Regarding the twist, I do like the ending. "Let there be light", regardless of your religious beliefs, just has a perfect flow to it. It's the perfect way to open a book (in this case by closing the book to eternity past). I just wish that I would've found a way to make the rest of it a worthy lead-in.

Vogons didn't quite Vogon (we came close, though), but we won't lose anyone this week, so we get to party, anyway.

Spookymilk Survivor X: Seemingly Useless Superpower

2012-01-16T11:06:00.002-06:00

So, here we are. It's getting to be crunch time.Will Vogons blaze a glorious path to...erm... glory? Or will they make horrible choices and go down in flames?

This week's challenge was "Seemingly Useless Superpower". In it, a character was to have a superpower that seemed on the outset to be completely useless, only for it to come in very handy. I did pretty well at this one last time.

What about this time? Was I able to top "4 or 5 servings"? Well, that's doubtful, but maybe I did fairly well, anyway. Read on, faithful reader.

The spectral blade sliced effortlessly through the Crimson Crusader, instantly cleaving his boyish, yet devilishly handsome face from his perfectly chiseled torso. With that, Baron Parallax surveyed the scene. The heroes all lay dead – most of them in several pieces.

“Perfect” he said to Bludgeoner, “just in time for the summoning.”

“Boss, there’s another one here. He’s just hiding behind the table.” replied Bludgeoner.

“Bring him to me.”
Bludgeoner shoved the hero toward the Baron.

“And just who might y…”

“I AM THE INTERJECTION!” cried the now-named hero.

“Why were you cowering behind the table. Why would they even bother bringing you if you w…”

“I MAKE NON-CONTEXTUAL COMMENTS AT INOPPORTUNE TIMES!!!”

“Excellent! A speech-themed super. You’re certain that you don’t turn into a hulking behemoth if expos…”

“I HAVE THE POWER OF MAKING NON-CONTEX…”

“Yes, yes… Now, believe it or not, I’m actually glad you showed up today. Bludgeoner and I are going to need a blood sacrifice to properly awaken the demon lord. Your friends are volunteered, but got a little excited and started things early, and Kil’zumall likes his sacr…”

“SUMMONING THE DEMON LORD KIL’ZUMAL, ARE YOU? I’VE PIECED TOGETHER YOUR NEFARIOUS PLOT!”

“Anyway, the urge to murder you is only going up by the second, but we’ve got to wait for the proper time. If you’ll excuse me, I’ve got work…”

“I WILL FOIL YOUR SCHEMES, VILE WARLOCK!”

“That I doubt, but I’m eager to see how you try. Let’s begin.”
Parallax placed the spectral blade on the unholy altar as Bludgeoner tied The Interjection to an obelisk. The Baron sprinkled some red liquid in a circle around himself, then began to chant the dark rituals.

“Aggras… tolifas…. Arvelan…”

“YOUR ANCIENT DARK SPEECH ACCENT IS ALMOST AS ABSURD AS YOUR SINISTER DESIGNS, FIEND!”

“Tos vali Kil’Zumall, arvas belias Kil’Zumall”

“EVIL WILL ALWAYS END IN RUIN, YOU KOOKY CLAIRVOYANT!”

“Arved, scho’il…”

“YOUR CABAL…”

“Arved, scho’il… varmas scho’il… Kil’zumall varithras a… SHUT THE FUCK UP.” Baron Tiberon snapped at The Interjection, “wait… where was I?? Oh…”

Indeed, The Interjection had broken the sorcerer’s concentration just as he was specifying the target for the blood sacrifice. An enormous black cloud began to pour into the room from both doors.

“Bludgeoner, you might want to make your exit…”

The cloud materialized into a massive demon. Kil’zumall picked up the blade from the altar and instantly jumped across the room, killing Bludgeoner instantly. He began to walk toward the now terrified warlock.

“No no no no no no no… come on, the pronunciation wasn’t even all that close. I meant ‘shut the fuck up’, not ‘shada faku’. See? Nothing alike! For fuck’s sake, listen to him… you’d be doing the same thing within…”

“HA, SILLY SORCERER, YOUR MACHINATIONS ARE ALL IN VAIN!”

“Interjection, so help me if one of my followers figured how to resurrect me. I will…”

“I’LL BE WAITING, YOU BATTY OLD WIZARD.”

“…Plankton won’t even be able to find any part of you to…” Baron Parallax’ words were cut off, along with his head, which rolled up to The Interjection’s feet. Kil’Zumall turned and approached The Interjection.

“NOW IT’S JUST THE TWO OF US, DEMON LORD. I WILL DEFEAT YOU.”

The abomination paused a moment, likely considering the fact that if he killed the bizarrely confident motormouth standing before him, that there was a good chance that his soul would be permanently bound to him. Kil’Zumall turned and trudged back up to the altar, before disappearing into a cloud of black smoke once more.

Here's the judges' take.

K: This one peaks early. I thought it was going to be the challenge of the week, but instead, it was
just pretty good. This is a bit of a cheat, I suppose, since interrupting people is something that anyone can do, but I was amused enough to give it a break. 4

DK: I laughed almost as much as I did at the pronunciation one, but especially at the “pieced together” line. Dude’s not just non-contextual, he’s Captain Obvious. 5

Huh. I was not really expecting scores that high. After writing a few darker ones, I wanted to write something that was just out and out comedic. Of course, what I ended up with still had plenty of darkness (it does open with all of the superheroes, save our annoying protagonist, torn to shreds and dead), but it captured the feel that I was going for (Like Tapioca, The Interjection is weirdly over-confident and impossibly self-unaware). You can't see it here or in the version on Spooky's site, but The Interjection speaks in Comic Sans typeface. I thought that fitting, but I don't know if that helps or hurts it. It's probably just as well it didn't come through - the shouting was enough. I like "batty old wizard".

The ending kind of sucks. I kept thinking up and rejecting different things that could happen in the end. I almost ended it with Kil'Zumall (heh, Kills 'em all) killing The Interjection out of annoyance, only to have their souls bound together for all of eternity, but rejected it when I couldn't get the wording right.

Either way, it didn't matter. One week after voting out Zack, the person we saved in place of him went and nonsubbed. This is obviously horrible news. JG, how could you, man?? Vogons can't vogon if we've got nonsubs...

Spookymilk Survivor X: Aladdin's Lamp

2012-01-09T10:50:00.001-06:00

Last week, Vogons had to do the first non-trivial voting out of the competition. Everyone submitted again this week, so voting is actually important again this week. Will Vogons be voting another one of their number out? Or will they be Vogoning all over their competition? Read on.

This week's challenge was "Aladdin's Lamp", a twist on the old "three wishes" myth. The protagonist of the story was allowed three wishes - one had to have a good result, one a bad result, and one an ambiguous result. How'd I do with such a task? Let's find out...

Here's my story:

Caleb Parker was a cheerful man.
That he put a gun to his head and fired was shocking enough. That his estranged ex-wife wordlessly handed me a white business card with the word ‘Omni’ on it at his funeral was puzzling.
Omni Incorporated looked unimpressive – a medium-sized office building in an area full of medium-sized office buildings. The lobby was the same. Unused chairs, nondescript art, and a receptionist’s desk. I wondered what they actually did, since there was no indication anywhere.
“May I help you?” The receptionist asked.
“I’d like an appointment.”
“I’m afraid we can’t do that without a reference or prior agreement.”
I fumbled in my pockets, searching for the card. Finding it, I pulled it out. “I have this”.
“This way, please.”
The man led me down a corridor, past several doors. Finally coming to the one he was looking for, he opened it and ushered me in. In the center of the room was a hospital bed, with a great deal of computer equipment hooked to it via some cabling. “Make yourself comfortable. Doctor Henter will be in shortly.”
After a wait, a woman came into the room and introduced herself as Dr. Madison Henter. I shook her hand as she explained the process. I would be placed in a deep, medically-induced sleep for somewhere around two hours, while the machine (‘Eidolan’, she called it) would do its thing – whatever that thing might be (she wouldn’t elaborate).
“Are you sure you want to do this?” she asked “none of our first time users actually undergo the procedure on the first day.”
While the idea of being put into a coma didn’t entirely sit well with me, I needed to understand what happened to Caleb. “I’m quite certain” I said “Let’s do this.”
Dr. Henter placed the IV with the anesthetic and had me count down from ten. I don’t recall hitting seven.
“Hello, I am a digital construct here to ensure the merging process is as smooth as possible for all who would use Eidolan. You may call me Eve.”
I wasn’t in the medical room. Instead, I was in a room with no clear walls – only a fuzzy white expanse with no clear limit. In front of me stood a beautiful woman.
“Where am I?”
“It is designated ‘The Shimmering’, it is a white space where your subconscious can interface directly with Eidolan’s hardware.”
“What do I do now?”
“Eidolan can sense your innate desires and make them reality.”
“Any desire?”
“Yes.”
“How is that possible?”
“It is not for the user to try to understand these things. Please, what is your deepest desire?”
I’m not even sure why Claire came to mind. I hadn’t seen her in three years, and we had not parted under good graces. I should have asked for a million dollars, or a private continent. Instead, my subconscious insisted on trying to get my ex-girlfriend back.
I woke up disoriented in the waiting room with a slight headache. I took the bus home. When I got to my apartment, I was shocked to see Claire sitting on the step.
“How is this possible?” I asked her as stepped forward and hugged me warmly.
“I was just thinking of you this afternoon” she said “I thought about everything, and I shouldn’t have left. I think we should try again.”
Claire and I talked for a couple of hours before I sneaked off to get some rest. I should have been skeptical. I should have disbelieved my ‘good fortune’. Instead, I slept like a baby.
The next day, I awoke to see Eve sitting in a chair at the foot of my bed.
“What are you doing here?” I demanded “you don’t even exist.”
“True, but the process that the Eidolan uses has some residual effects. Think of me as an afterimage, a sort of merging between the version found in the Shimmering and of your own mental biases.”
“How is all of this possible. The last time Claire and I spoke, she told me that she never wanted to see me again.”
“Whatever else you may do…never ask that question.”
“I can’t just let this go unanswered…”
“I know.”
Later that day, I went back to Omni and made another appointment.
Inside, Eve greeted me. “Welcome back, Josh. I trust you are happy with the results of yesterday’s session?”
“I am, but I need to know how this works.”
“It is not your place…”
“Yes, I know what your policy is” I interrupted “I just don’t know if I can accept it.”
“Surely there must be something else. Do you want a promotion? A private island, perhaps?”
“This is all impossible.”
“Impossible is such a limiting term. Expand beyond it.”
My better sense told me to be wary of answers like this. This had to be a scam, something dangerous, even. It had killed Caleb hadn’t it? Still, curiosity won out.
“Please. Anything is possible. Do not let your skepticism keep you from taking advantage of this opportunity.”
“I just… don’t know. What if I ask for a million dollars?”
“Anything.”
“I want to be able to play the guitar.”
“You don’t have higher aspirations?”
“I’ve always wanted to play, but mostly, I need to know that this isn’t coincidence.”
“Fair enough.”
I awoke. On the way home, I stopped at a music shop and bought a guitar. That night, I serenaded Claire with the most beautiful guitar playing that she’d ever heard. Again, I slept like a baby.
I awoke the next day with the worst headache I’d ever experienced. I rushed to the bathroom to find my nose bleeding.
“My counterpart should have warned you about repeated use of the machine.”
“What in the fuck is this?”
“The process causes strain on the human brain. If spread out over weeks, it’s not serious. You’ve done it twice in the last three days…”
“Is this how Caleb died?”
“I beg your pardon?”
“What did it do to him? How does it work, Eve??”
“Do you really want to know what happened to Caleb?”
“You fucking know I need to…”
“Then you know what must be done.”
Omni Incorporated had closed for the weekend, and the only human presence was a lone security guard sitting at the front desk sipping coffee. With Eve’s help, I slipped by him easily. She led me to the Eidolan, and assisted me in turning it on. I slipped myself the sedative and quickly lapsed into The Shimmering.
Eve was there, as before. Her form was different than before – almost alien in its appearance.
“I cannot convince you to just accept this?”
“No. I want to know what happened to my friend Caleb Parker. I want to know how this works.”
Eve gave a slight nod. I woke up.
I was a cheerful man, once.

And here's the judge's critique:

K: I really like the opening and closing lines here. Stories that come around ending where they began can be a little hacky in less apt hands, but the use of the same dichotomous language made it pop. There are some pacing issues and the tension feels like it should be greater, but this concept is very strong. 2
DK: I like this template, with the hero who keeps going in a dangerous direction, but it too doesn’t strike me like some of the other ones do. Like most of these, though, there really isn’t anything wrong with it. 2

A couple notes on scoring. I'm actually very happy with these results for reasons I'll get into in a bit. Judging was done on a forced curve (so there were only two 5's to be given out, two 4's, and so on...) this was, to use, Spooky's words, one of the best weeks I've ever seen, so for both judges to think mine merited above a one is excellent especially considering...

It is truly astounding what one can't do with 1200 words. I had a grand idea for this story. Lots of exposition, lots of backstory, lots of character development. Writing the story the way I wanted to write it meant that by the second wish, I had already used 1800 words. I panicked, then wrote up a completely nonsensical submission just in case I wasn't able to make the sad story of Caleb Parker work (don't worry, you'll get to see that, too...) I went in with a hatchet and cleared away huge chunks of the story. The introduction has hit the hardest - entire scenes were removed. On the one hand, I guess it made the story a little leaner, on the other hand, motivations were obscured, characters weren't built up, and I had to axe some dialog that I liked a lot.

The final product was riddled with pacing issues because the cuts (I could've cut down further, but I had to have something to resonate, and 1200 words of "and then this happened" would've been awful). With ten minutes to spare, I essentially had a meltdown, said 'screw it', and submitted what I had. Truly disappointing.

Even if I had been able to shape this the way I wanted to, I don't know that I would've gotten very much higher a score. People brought it this week. When I saw my score, then saw Brooks' score, I knew that Vogons had another vote coming our way.

...only we didn't. Beau, Matt, and John brought the heat and the flavor, and our glorious team ended not only not finishing last, but winning outright. Granted it wasn't by much, but it was enough. Good going all around, gentlemen.

Break out the 'Vogons Gonna Vogon' tag!

Spookymilk Survivor X: Payoffs

2012-01-02T14:54:00.001-06:00

A couple weeks ago, you'll remember we had to write cliffhangers. I wrote a pretty decent one (which apparently intimidated everyone, because no one paid it off, though I have no idea how I'd pay it off myself, so it's something like a season finale of a TV series in that way, since almost none of those end up paying off in a particularly fulfilling way).

This week, we had to pay off those cliffhangers. The only rule was that you couldn't choose your own (fine by me... I wouldn't have, anyway). I chose Matt Novak's, and never even considered another.

Here's my entry.

The battle raged on, but it quickly became apparent that it was a battle that the crew couldn’t hope to win. They fought valiantly, but were eventually boarded. Pirates poured onto the main deck and began to round up the survivors. Edward and James O’Leary were prodded below deck to show the pirates what the ship had to offer. One of the pirates was getting much too close to a door that Edward needed to keep him away from at all costs.

The marauder lingered for a moment near the door to Rashmi’s cabin. Another couple of seconds, and he would surely find her – Edward’s imagination recoiled at what would happen then. Edward had to act quickly. Bravery was going to have to come in an unorthodox manner.

“We’re carrying a supplies for the new colony!”

“Edward, no…” moaned First Mate O’Leary, but it was too late. The pirate moved away from the cabin door. Edward needed to keep him moving further. He shot O’Leary an apologizing glance.

“There’s plenty of food and fresh water to supply a ship like yours for at least three months.”

The man started toward him cautiously. “Why would ye be assisting us?” he motioned his sword toward Edward “what be in it for ye?”

Suddenly a booming voice came from the top of the stairs. “What, indeed?” as the pirate captain smirked down at them all, captives and pirates alike. “Still, if the boy be telling the truth…”

Edward led the pirates to the supplies. The pirate captain nodded approvingly. “It took minerals to give up yer cargo like that to save yer crew, especially when they’ll hate ye for it,” he said, “I’ve a proposition for ye.”

“Go on.” Edward said, eying him warily.

“I’ll turn a blind eye to whatever or whomever else might be aboard yer vessel on one condition. You come aboard my ship and live the life of a buccaneer.”

Edward startled – God, no… “And if I refuse?”

“My crew are quite thorough about tearing a ship and her crew apart to find what might be hidden.”

Edward thought of Rashmi’s kiss. Then he thought of her final words to him.

“…be waiting… you are the one to be brave”.

He made his choice, Edward the deck hand was gone. He would begin his life anew as a pirate. For Rashmi.

...and here are the judge's comments...

K: The ending lines felt a little hammy to me, and the dialogue is a little…obvious, but this story does have the excitement and scope of the lead-in. Once again, I want to see what happens beyond this installment. 4

DK: A logical direction for this story to end up going in, although the way it gets there (i.e. the content of dialogue of the pirates) feels a little perfunctory and (sorry Colin) on-the-nose. 3

Okay, some things were conspiring against me here...

a) It was late, late New Year's Eve Night (or early, early New Year's Day. take your pick), and I had been drinking beer, wine, and champagne since about 6. My sobriety wasn't gone, but it was compromised.

b) Matt's original piece (readable here) had a great serial-like quality to it (it's why I chose his to payoff in the first place), and I didn't realize how difficult it was going to be to recreate that while still having that semi-unrealistic sheen that all of those old serials had. I came up short on that front.

c) My dialog writing skills, which have been pretty decent so far this season utterly failed me. Everything here was super on the nose. "And if I refuse?" come on, man... that exact line has been used no fewer than nine billion times.

I still mostly like where I took this, I just should have given myself the time to polish it a bit, since the dialog is rough, and it gets to the point too quickly. What I won't apologize for is the sappy, hammy feel that the whole thing has - that was the point. Matt's wasn't super hammy, but it had that cheesy "boy on the high seas" vibe of the old pirate serials or Treasure Island (which was a partial inspiration when I was writing this). Again, that's not a slam at all, that's why I picked it.

The unfortunate part about this whole thing is that if I would've cleaned it up even a little, I might've gotten a 4 from DK, which would have given us just enough to beat out Spoiler Alert. As it stands, we were in last place by a fraction of a point. It stands to reason that the dream team would have to evict a player on the first week that we actually got full submissions.

Vogons ain't vogonning this week.

Top 30 Most listened to Songs of 2011

2012-01-01T09:02:00.000-06:00

Okay, first off, for the uninitiated, here's the deal.

I'm weirdly obsessive over things I shouldn't be obsessive over. One of the ways that manifests itself is that I keep track of every time I hear a particular song over the course of the year (assuming, of course, that I have it in my library). iPod, CDs in the car, radio in the car, radio in the wife's car.....all of it. Again, weirdly obessive.

All of that to let you know... when I say 'Top 30 most listened to', I mean it.

You already know this, but Spotify, Grooveshark, and YouTube for all of these.

Edit: This is what happens when your time gets all taken up, and don't remember to reschedule your post.

30. The National - Conversation 16
"I was afraid, I'd eat yours brains... cuz I'm evil..."

29. The Let Go - Nightfall (feat. P.O.S.)
A random rap group I'd never heard of, but this song has a pretty good P.O.S. verse on it, and that's usually enough to get me to listen.

28. Coldplay - Every Teardrop is a Waterfall
Mylo Xyloto wasn't nearly as good as Viva la Vida, but I'm still a sucker for Coldplay.

27. Bon Iver - Calgary
(12th favorite song of 2011)

My favorite song from my favorite album from this year.

26. OneRepublic - Good Life

This song was inescapable, and my wife loved it... so I heard it a lot. In fairness, it's not the worst song the radio has to offer, it's fairly inoffensive, even if it does boil down to Ryan Tedder talking about how awesome being rich and famous is. Still, if that's acceptable (and even welcomed) by people when discussing rap music, I won't hold it against pop music.

25. The National - Exile Vilify
(3rd favorite song of 2011)

I still have no idea what this song has to do with Portal 2.

24. The Vaccines - All in White
(11th favorite song of 2011)

I have last.fm to thank for this one. Their "best of 2011" tag didn't give me anything else that I hadn't heard before that I actually took to heart, but this song was worth it.

23. Foster the People - Helena Beat

The words make zero sense ("yeah, yeah, it's okay/I tie my hands up to a chair so I don't fall that way") and I had a hell of a time telling if the singer was a chick or a dude in the beginning (for the record, it's a dude), but this song is blazingly catchy. It was apparently a single, which makes wonder how on earth it didn't make any sort of impact, it has that feeling of classic MGMT.

22. Bon Iver - Beth/Rest

This song is so insanely 80's. The electronic piano, the light saxophone. I usually hate that style, so why do I like it here so much?

21. TV on the Radio - Second Song
(6th favorite song of 2011)

This song would've been much higher on this list if I'd heard it before June. For some reason, this album got no hype. It came and went, to the point where a lot of people simply left it off their year end lists. That couldn't have possibly been because it wasn't good, and it was certainly memorable. It's a mystery.

20. Lil' Wayne - Right Above It

I didn't like I Am Not a Human Being, and I really didn't like Tha Carter IV. For some reason, though, this song stuck with me.

19. jj - STILL

This song was released on the free Kills mixtape on December 30th last year. jj do a half decent job of mixing the chilly Scandinavian icy pop sound with hip-hop - never better than this song, though. As a bonus, it swipes a nice Dre sample.

18. Cinnamon Chasers - Lux Deluxe

This one was weird. I found the song via a music video (one of my favorite music videos in a long time). Even though the song wasn't anything special at the time, through repeatedly watching the video, I started to enjoy the song itself.

17. The Antlers - No Widows
(23rd favorite song of 2011)

I wouldn't have gotten into Burst Apart without this song. Perfect nighttime listening.

16. Tim Hecker - The Piano Drop
(30th favorite song of 2011)

My wife recently asked me to explain how on earth it was that I liked this song. It has no conventional structure, no melody - it's essentially a pitch-obliterated organ run through a million effects. I still don't know how to answer that question.

15. TV on the Radio - Caffeinated Consiousness

Heard this one first at Trinkenspiel 2011. It amped up my expectations for Nine Types of Light (unfortunately, as I noted earlier, those expectations were quickly forgotten). Thanks, Crat.

14. The Clash at Demonhead - Black Sheep

This band doesn't actually exist. Metric did the version of this song for the Scott Pilgrim vs. The World soundtrack, but this is the actual version you hear in the movie, only the full thing. I like this version a lot better, even though I love Metric.

13. Jonathan Coulton - Want You Gone
(27th favorite song of 2011)

Better than 'Still Alive'. How is Coulton going to top this?

12. Radiohead - Codex
(2nd favorite song of 2011)

The first song that really grabbed me from The King of Limbs. Still my favorite.

11. Yeasayer - Madder Red
(most played song of 2010)

Yup, I was still listening to this song a ton at the beginning of the year. Not so much as the year went on, but enough that it shows up here.

10. SALEM - Trapdoor

What a wretched song. It's misogynistic, it's got those annoying pitch-shifted vocals, and when it's performed live, the results are entirely horrifying.....and yet, I could not stop listening to it.

9. The Pains of Being Pure at Heart - Belong
(7th favorite song of 2011)

Shame this was one of the only good songs on this album.

8. Anamanaguchi - Another Winter

Another Scott Pilgrim song, this time from the video game. It's one of the catchiest video games songs ever. It's one of those live band/8-bit video game song hybrids, only where every single other one of those bands is utterly awful, this one is awesome. The entire soundtrack is fantastic, but this song is really something.

7. Adele - Rolling in the Deep
(17th favorite song of 2011)

My wife's favorite album and favorite song of 2011. I really didn't mind, though, because it is a hell of a tune.

6. Foster the People - Pumped Up Kicks
(15th favorite song of 2011)

This one snuck up on everyone, but my favorite part about this song was how many people were saying prior to June/July "oh, dude... you have to hear this band Foster the People", and then after this song went insane, they were all trying to distance themselves from it. Lame.

5. ...And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead - Summer of All Dead Souls
(10th favorite song of 2011)

Yup, I've said about as much about this one as I have to say about it.

4. SALEM - King Night

A lot of these plays were playing it for other people. Still, though, this song really stood out for me. I love the superdark style of it, I love the fact that it's woven around a farking Christmas carol, I love that little jagged synth line that ends every other line. I just love this song.

3. The Weeknd - House of Balloons/Glass Table Girls
(5th favorite song of the year)

The rest of the album is good, this is just on another level. The sample is responsible for a lot of that, but The Weeknd seems to realize that this song is going to be his 'big deal', so he takes everything up a notch. It's almost 7 minutes long, but goes by in a blur - a druggy, sex-crazed blur.

2. Tyler, the Creator - Yonkers
(4th favorite song of 2011)

I had no interest in Tyler after Bastard. His overly confessional, rape-fantasy filled, hyper-violent style held no interest for me. Then this song came out. It didn't change anything about his lyrical style - he's style talking about murdering Bruno Mars and his conscience committing suicide. The beat is an absolute monster, though, and he fills the song with enough clever lines to where I really really dug it. I thought that maybe he'd brought his game up a level or two, so I bought into Goblin.

Oops!

1. The Go! Team - Buy Nothing Day
(favorite song of 2011)

No surprises here at all. It wasn't even remotely close (this one almost doubled 'Yonkers'). Beth Cosentino gives her best vocal performance, and gets a song out of it that no one associated with it will be able to top - or even really come close to.

Top 20 Albums of 2011

2011-12-31T01:27:00.000-06:00

Presented, as last year, with limited comment. Spotify and Grooveshark links for all.

20. Beastie Boys
Hot Sauce Committee, Pt 2

RIYL: The Beastie Boys

The Beastie Boys returned in style after the mostly 'meh' To the 5 Boroughs. Solid hooks and clever lines throughout.

19. Tim Hecker
Ravedeath, 1972

RIYL: Droning bliss, the world's most melodic air conditioner

The year's most surprising album. I gave it a preliminary listen thinking I would easily discard it. That shit is haunting.

18. Panda Bear
Tomboy

RIYL: Watery sounding music, lots of vocal layers, The Beach boys being played in a really big room.

Lots of highs, a couple dry spots in the middle. Still enough on the high end to come back to again and again.

17. Sims
Bad Time Zoo

RIYL: Doomtree, Really wordy rappers, books about 'Occupy wall street'

Sims rubs me the wrong way a lot of times, so the instant I preordered his CD, I wondered why I had done so. I proceeded to love it.

16. Drake
Take Care

RIYL: Really rich people humblebragging constantly.

I don't know exactly how I got to this point. The dude just makes catchy music that works as great as driving music during summer or winter, day or night. The production on his tracks fascinates me.

15. Dessa
Castor, the Twin

RIYL: Jazzy female fronted rap, High swagger to body weight ratios

I had already heard a lot of these arrangements at Blowout VI, but the jazzier live band really gives Dessa that "chanteuse in a smoky bar" vibe that really fits these songs.

14. The Weeknd
House of Balloons

RIYL: Lurid, debauched parties, Smooth crooning, drugs.... lots of drugs, sex

How to become a really big deal in 2011... work your ass off, release three albums worth of material. Oh yeah, make incredibly catchy songs that make six minutes feel a quarter that long (also, talk about sex and drugs a lot).

13. Blue Sky Black Death
Noir

RIYL: Huge sonic landscapes, instrumental hip-hop that doesn't have anything to do with hip-hop.

Nothing could ever replace Endtroducing, but at times this feels like a slightly more cinematic version of that DJ Shadow masterpiece.

12. Kurt Vile
Smoke Ring For My Halo

RIYL: Acoustic guitars, cynical lyrics

Smoke Ring For My Halo was a welcome surprise. I didn't expect much out of it, since I'm not big into the wandering acoustic rock thing. Vile's arrangements just feel so much fuller than most of his genre.

11. James Blake
James Blake

RIYL: Soul/Dubstep hybrids... are those a thing?

I didn't listen to a lot of Blake's output last year (I'm sure I'll remedy that soon enough), but this worked as a good introduction. Surprisingly good vocals and well constructed songs.

10. Viva Voce
The Future Will Destroy You

RIYL: Pretty much anything. Seriously. Why aren't you listening to these guys?

Husband/wife duo Viva Voce are a great band that I haven't been able to get anyone into yet. They make good rootsy rock music. Sometimes she sings, sometimes he sings. Listen to their music.

9. Doomtree
No Kings

RIYL: Vaguely indie-ish rap that doesn't succumb to standard indie rap tropes

With "No Kings", Doomtree really branched out their production to new places. Almost all of them worked for me, and the rappers themselves sounded fresh and up to the challenge, ready to tear into that new direction.

8. Childish Gambino
Camp

RIYL: Clever lines and good hooks, smartasses, rappers who enjoy Rugrats

This album is kind of a combination of the bite I wanted from a Tyler, the Creator CD mixed with the pop and R&B sensibility that Drake infuses everything with. Thanks to Andrew for the heads up.

7. Cults
Cults

RIYL: Catchy, retro tunes with dark secrets, small, coastal new england towns

I didn't buy the hype last summer, but the debut album was alluringly dark, yet catchy. It was sort of like if Best Coast joined... well... a cult.

6. The Antlers
Burst Apart

RIYL: Sad songs, songs about the endings of beautiful things, the end of Old Yeller

I'm slowly coming around on The Antlers. Not just this album, but their whole discography. This one still reigns supreme, though. A thoroughly emotive and exhausting listen.

5. …And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead
Tao of the Dead

RIYL: Doodling dragons on the back of your chemistry notebook

Trail of Dead keeps insisting on making the music bigger and bigger, at this point it's in for a penny, in for a pound. That means, that for every tightly spun barnstormer, there's a 17 minute proggy beast. Luckily, I enjoy it all.

4. Radiohead
The King of Limbs

RIYL: The Kid A side of Radiohead, Thom Yorke, Skittery Beats

I'll admit, if this wasn't Radiohead, I don't know if I would have given it as many listens as it needed to grow on me. Once it did, though, it stuck with me. There's not a weak track on the album.

3. TV on the Radio
Nine Types of Light

RIYL: All thing funky, the vocal stylings of Tunde Adebimpe

I was sort of surprised to see how much this album got slept on. It's definitely moving further toward TVotR's funky side than their previous offerings, but hearing songs like "Second Song" proves that's actually a pretty good thing.

2. The Go! Team
Rolling Blackouts

RIYL: Cheerleaders, explosions (of confetti), saying everything in double dutch time

The formula hasn't steered them wrong yet, why would they change it - especially when they seem to have come closer to perfecting it here than ever before.

1. Bon Iver
Bon Iver, Bon Iver

RIYL: Beards

It's the fashionable pick this year, but it got that way for a reason. I tried to resist the siren call, it didn't work. Each of these songs feels like part of my daily life at this point. If the lyrics don't quite have that naked emotional honesty that The National struck last year with High Violet (and I don't think they quite do), the music itself does more than enough speaking. It whispers, it strains, it breathes, it squalls - and Justin Vernon's weirdly compelling voice sails the album through that storm. In the Grammy nominated (!?) Holocene, he sings "...and at once I knew, I was not magnificent..."

Meh, I disagree.

Top 30 Songs of 2011

2011-12-30T09:22:00.000-06:00

Yeah, ya heard. Thirty. Because twenty wouldn't have been enough. I made a Spotify playlist out of these songs. They all require a listen, so go ahead and do that.

Also, I had written all of this list down, along with writeups that I was feeling pretty good about (probably somewhere in the range of 1000 words. I was proofreading everything, when suddenly my computer rebooted, and when I came back, Blogspot had saved precisely nothing. My fury is undying.

Enough complaining, on with the list.

Edit: The Spotify Playlist is now live. A few of the songs aren't available on Spotify, but 24 of them are.

30. Tim Hecker - The Piano Drop
Ravedeath, 1972

The first time you hear this song, it sounds like noise. Each subsequent listen reveals just a little more until suddenly you're finding yourself riding along with the rattling lower sounds and feeling giddy every time the higher sounds start pulsating from left to right. Listening to this song on a good sound system in a completely dark room is one of the more revelatory experiences of the year.

29. Wugazi - Sleep Rules Everything Around Me
13 Chambers

Okay, so maybe there is a clear number so far as machups are concerned. Hearing Raekwon's and Inspektah Deck's raps from "C.R.E.A.M." laid over the haunting piano from "I'm So Tired" makes it feel like those song were meant for each other in the first place. By the time Ian MacKaye comes in singing "I'm so tired/sheep are counting me", I wasn't sure I wanted to hear them any other way.

28. Cults - Abducted
Cults

Boy meets girl, girl falls in love with boy, boy emotionally abducts girl, knowing that he'll never feel for her what she feels for him - it's a classic story, but Maddie Follin sings it with such conviction that it still feel fresh. "It tore me apart, cause I really loved him." Ah, haven't we all been there?

27. Jonathan Coulton - Want You Gone
Portal 2

"Still Alive" was, in its own little way, a huge thing that sort of came out of nowhere. It would have been easy for Jonathan Coulton to rest on his laurels and write a silly song about cake and lies. Instead, he easily tops his earlier success with "Want You Gone". "I used to want you dead, but now I only want you gone." is one of my favorite lyrics of the year, comedic or no.

26. Florence and the Machine - Shake It Out
Ceremonials

I mentioned te other day that I'm kind of over Florence and the Machine as an album artist, but every so often, they can still craft a hell of a song. "Shake It Out" has everything I want from them - huge voice, huge hook, huge arrangement. Florence's voice has never sounded like it deserves to be booming from every radio on earth to the extent that it does here.

25. Cage the Elephant - Shake Me Down
Thank You, Happy Birthday

After yesterday, you knew it ad to be on here somewhere. The last minute or so of the song is obviously what lands it a spot here, but taken as a whole, it's just a good throwback rock song.

24. Elbow - The Birds
Build a Rocket Boys!

Like I said, Guy Garvey knows how to craft an epic tune. He and the rest of the band make this 8+ minute song seem half that long.

23. The Antlers - No Widows
Burst Apart

It took a while for me to warm up to Burst Apart, but I took to "No Widows" instantly. The lyrics are haunting, the roiling undercurrent of the song is the perfect kind of dark churn, and Peter Silberman turns in one of his most understated vocal performances on the album. It never kicks it up a notch - it doesn't have to. When you've got a song with that much character, you don't need to add theatrics.

22. Childish Gambino - Heartbeat
Camp

Who would've known that a beat that sounds like it was lifted from a Justice b-side would be the perfect vehicle for an emo-rap about post-relationship limbo? The last verse here owns.

21. Kendrick Lamar - A.D.H.D.
Section 80

This might be the most atmospheric rap song of the year. The lyrics are sharp, the hook is memorable, and the production feel like it's breathing. I didn't hear the album early enough for it to really have a chance to sink in, but this song hasn't left my iPod for more than a day or two since I first heard it.

20. Viva Voce - Black Mood Ring
The Future Will Destroy You

The absolute highlight of one of themost underrated albums of the year. The ending, where Anita just sings "I won't be coming back" over and over and the almost country-sounding guitar locks in and slowly fades out is another favorite moment of mine this year.

19. Doomtree - Beacon
No Kings

Dessa songs are generally my favorite Doomtree songs. When she teams up with P.O.S., it's even better. This one was a guaranteed hit with me based on that alone, but then you consider the almost video game inspired beat and great lines like "You called it in the air/It landed on its edge/when the crowd gathered round/you turned tail/I turned heads" (another favorite lyric this year).

18. Lana Del Rey - Blue Jeans
Video Games

I thought that "Video Games" was alright, but "Blue Jeans" was the one that really grabbed me. "I will love you til the end of time/I would wait a million years" might be one of the most heart-wrenching lines of the year. If Lana Del Rey can follow up with anything even remotely this good, she'll be worth the hype.

17. Adele - Rolling in the Deep
21

Yeah, it got super overplayed, and it seemed for a while like it was all they played on the radio. There was a reason for that. This is a tune. It burns with a controlled anger ("You're gonna wish you never had met me", indeed). Adele owned 2001, and rightfully so.

16. Panda Bear - Tomboy
Tomboy

There are lyrics to this song. I only really know that because I looked them up online. They're not particularly important, because Noah Lennox's voice is just another instrument in this song - but what an instrument. They overlap, dart, and weave into the very fabric of 'Tomboy'. They (and the guitars, I suppose) make this my favorite Panda Bear song to date.

15. Foster the People - Pumped Up Kicks
Torches

Right before this song surprisingly got huge, people acted genuinely surprised that this song had a dark undercurrent. I don't see how that's possible. The bassline bleeds menace. It's really the bassline that does a lot of the heavy lifting in this song. Sure the hook is catchy as hell, but there's always that bassline, just waiting for you to get too comfortable...

14. M83 - Midnight City
Hurry Up, We're Dreaming.

I'm not breaking any new ground by calling 2011 the 'year of the saxophone'. Bon Iver used it, so did The Rapture and Destroyer. Hell, even Lady Gaga and Katy Perry released singles that prominently featured the saxophone. Even still, the winner for 'Best Saxophone of 2011' has to go to "Midnight City". Sorry, Katy, at least you had that video with Kenny G.

13. Burial - Stolen Dog
Street Halo

When Street Halo was announced, I was hoping that it would have the traditional Burial sound. I needn't have worried, I guess. The best song on the EP is "Stolen Dog", which is maybe the best distillation to date of what Burial does very well. There's plenty of artists who employ the skittering future garage beat, but I can't think of another artist who does so which this much warmth and bona-fide human feeling to it.

12. Bon Iver - Calgary
Bon Iver, Bon Iver

I like "Holocene" and all, but I was surprised to hear that the majority consensus is that it's one of the best songs of the year. I'd say it's not even the best song on the album (that would be this one, just so we're clear).

11. The Vaccines - All in White
What Did You Expect From the Vaccines?

"All in White" sounds vaguely like something that Interpol would've made a few years ago. That's by no means a bad thing. Justin Young's exasperated exclamation of "Lord I know your type..." is great.

10. ...And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead - Summer of All Dead Souls
Tao of the Dead

Trail of Dead are pretty good at making rock music sound big. Some people have lamented the fact that that's the type of music they want to make now. I'm not one of those people.

9. Beastie Boys - Make Some Noise
Hot Sauce Committee, Part 2

The video's fantastic, but this song for me meant one thing above all.

The Beastie Boys are back.

8. James Blake - The Wilhelm Scream
James Blake

It's just one phrase, repeated over and over again, deteriorating a little bit every time, until staticy electronica threatens to overtake the whole song. Then James Blake does something genius, he brings it all back into focus for one last run through. "I don't know about my dreams/I don't know about my dreamin' anymore/All that I know is/I'm fallin', fallin' fallin'/Might as well fall in".

7. The Pains of Being Pure at Heart - Belong
Belong

Crunchy guitars, soothing vocals, superhuge chorus. A great anthem.

6. TV on the Radio - Second Song
Nine Types of Light

In yesterday's list, I made note of the fact that this song made me smile more than any other song this year. It's absolutely true. The hook is just so funky. It demands movement. I hate dancing, and I grooved to this song every time it came on in the car. The song will not be denied.

5. The Weeknd - House of Balloons/Glass Table Girls
House of Balloons

It's the sample. Mindless Self Indulgence used it and became stars in their own super-weird way. The Weeknd appropriated it, and made the most undeniable party song of the year. Every time I heard this song, I instantly wanted to start one of those lurid, almost kind of creepy parties. Then 'Glass Table Girls' starts, and everyone remembers why those parties are usually terrible ideas.

4. Tyler, the Creator - Yonkers
Goblin

*Sigh*

I mean, how could Goblin not be awesome with a lead single this good??

3. The National - Exile Vilify
Portal 2

I'm still not sure exactly what this song has to do with Portal 2. A radio in one of the test chambers is playing this haunting, piano-driven piece. I carried that radio around the entire chamber, it was very inconvenient to do so, but I didn't even consider leaving the radio behind. Come to think of it, I didn't leave the radio behind on any of the subsequent playthroughs, either.

2. Radiohead - Codex
The King of Limbs

This song could easily be the sequel (or maybe prequel?) to "Pyramid Song". Same structure, with a somber piano providing the skeleton, and Thom Yorke giving his best vocal performance on the whole of The King of Limbs.

1. The Go! Team - Buy Nothing Day
Rolling Blackouts

Give Ian Parton a lot of credit, this song was recorded before Bethany Cosentino became huge with Best Coast. Only this blows away anything she's ever done with that band. It's just a bomb of up tempo bliss that caught my ear and wouldn't let go. It's been a long time since I've just flat out enjoyed a song this much. Expect tambourines, expect fun, and expect the catchiest song of 2011.

Top 20 Moments in Music of 2011

2011-12-29T02:37:00.000-06:00

I've been doing this list since 2008. It's fun, because what's more enjoyable than pointing out the crashing gong in 'I Was a Lover'? or the crazy "Because you're miiiiiiine" in 'I Put a Spell on You'? This list celebrates the little moments in music that make us stop for a second and go 'whoa'.

I wish I could put the "BOOM BA-DOOM BOOM" from "Superbass" on this list, but that came out in 2010, so even though it's the single part that got stuck in my head most this entire year, it gets retroactively put in the Top 10 for last year.

Spotify links for most, Grooveshark links for some, YouTube links for others.

20. Tyler, the Creator - Yonkers
"...stab Bruno Mars in his gotdamn esophagus..."

'Yonkers' is filled with tasty lines, but I do like the one about brutally murdering the pop singer that my wife is obsessed with most of all.

19. Sims - When it Rolls In
"It's okay"

The most surprising (and best) song on Bad Time Zoo builds up the tension, only to release it with a sigh instead of the usual angry out-lashing. Hearing Sims sing is different - to hear him sound defeated, then shrug it off by saying that he'll be alright no matter how bad things can be is uplifting.

18. Cults - You Know What I Mean
The Gear Change

This site calls it a "gear change". It's when the singer changes keys (almost always up) for the last run through the song (usually the last chorus... think the change in "Man in the Mirror"). Usually it's a bad thing (the site in question unequivocally states that it's always a bad thing). Cults' great song "You Know What I Mean" sort of plays with the trope - it's not quite the same melody, so I'm unsure of whether it fits or not. What I am sure of is the fact that little key change brings the song to a completely different level. Maybe the gear change can be a good thing sometimes?

17. Civil Wars - Barton Hollow
"Can't no preacher man save my soul..."

I vaguely remember Joy Williams as a CCM singer. I recall her doing some sort of bubbly pop music, I dunno, I could be way off - it was a different time, man. Either way, as half of the Civil Wars, she transforms into a folky, vaguely ominous spectre. On the title track of their quite good debut, Barton Hollow, she and bandmate John Paul White weave down a dark path, culminating in the line "Ain't going back to Barton Hollow/Devil gonna follow me e'er I go/Won't do me no good washing in the river/Can't no preacher man save my soul". Nicely done.

16. The Vaccines - All in White
"Oh my God, I think I'm hearing double"

I'm not sure why this particular line resonates with me. I just really like the great feeling of frustration to it.

15. …And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead - Summer of All Dead Souls
Guitar Intro

Trail of Dead have done the epic rock thing pretty well for a while now, finally getting the synthesis down on their last CD, Century of Self. In the opening guitar riff of 'Summer of All Dead Souls', they get to let loose with a excellent squall of a riff. I'm reasonably sure that there were plenty of times this summer that nearby drivers looked at me in puzzlement as I drove by them, furiously drumming to a beat they couldn't hear, bobbing my head in time with the guitar.

14. Kurt Vile - Runner Ups
"My best friend's long gone, but I got.....runner ups..."

Kurt Vile's song "Runner Ups" might be one of the more depressing songs of the year. Lines like "my whole life's been one long running gag" and "I don't know if it's real, but it's how I feel" get the point across, but the cynicism and venom he delivers the lyric in question tops it all. "My best friend's long gone, but I got.... runner ups...yeah".

13. Dessa - 551
The vibraphone intro

'551' was a hell of a song to begin with, but the vibraphones that begin the Castor, the Twin version really bring out the sadness and inevitable regret espoused in the song itself. They're so haunting that I kind of want to look up more vibraphone music, but feel that nothing could quite top what I've already heard here.

12. Viva Voce - Diamond Mine
Anita Robinson sighs and plays the guitar

Anita Robinson might just be one of my favorite people in music. She shreds on the guitar, she knows how to make a song either rock or chill, as needed, and her voice is a true melter. In "Diamond Mine", all she has to do is sort of sigh and play a little guitar with the perfect bit of distortion... yup, that'll do.

11. We Are Augustines - Juarez
"Got a drunk for a mother, got a saint for a brother"

I only heard this song for the first time a little under a month ago, but it caught on quick. "Juarez" is the vaugely autobiographical song about a trip to find lead singer Billy McCarthy's father. Toward the end of the song, McCarthy just repeats the closing line of the chorus "Got a drunk for a mother/Got a saint for a brother" for one of the most haunting codas I've heard in a long time.

10. The National - Exile Vilify
"Vilify"

The National manage to do this a lot. Their song from the Portal 2 soundtrack might be one of the most lyrically sparse they've made. Once the guitars and strings begin to swell for the second half of the song, all Matt Berninger has to do is sing "Vilify/Don't even try" to put the cherry on top and perfect the whole thing.

9. Doomtree - Fresh New Trash
"Rap won't save you"

I cop to two things. One, I've never been all that impressed with Mike Mictlan (he just doesn't have the vibe that I'm looking for when I'm listening to Doomtree records). Two, "Fresh new Trash" is a lesson in wastig a pretty good beat. Between listening to Cecil Otter waste four bars talking about the level in his headphones and Sims end seemingly every line "hey! alright okay!", there's precious little being done with one of the best beats Doomtree has had to work with. Then Mictlan comes in for the last verse. He lays waste to it, sounding fresher than I can remember him ever sounding, and closing by absolutely snarling "Rap won't save you", a great callback to one of the few other songs I've enjoyed him on. Maybe I'll give Deity For Hire a second chance...

8. Bon Iver - Perth
guitars hit

2:33 into the first song on Bon Iver's new record, one could be forgiven for thinking that not much has changed. Justin Vernon still sounds like Justin Vernon, the arrangement might be a bit lusher, but nothing that would've sounded particularly out of place on For Emma, Forever Ago. Suddenly, a wave of guitars hits, and the track is turned on its head. It sets the mood perfectly for the dramatic leap forward that takes place over the the rest of them album.

7. The Go! Team - Buy Nothing Day
The instrumental bridge bleeds seamlessly into the hook

I have a particular fondness for songs that don't slow down for the bridge, choosing instead to maintain the same breakneck pace through the entire song. As if there weren't enough reasons to love 'Buy Nothing Day', it has a great example of this. The bridge doesn't serve as a breather, it just reloads and amps you up for the hook - just the way I like it.

6. The Antlers - Putting the Dog To Sleep
"Prove to me/I'm not gonna die alone..."

The "dog euthanasia as metaphor for the end to a relationship" of "Putting the Dog to Sleep" could have been hamfisted and trite. Instead, through lead singer Peter Silberman's verging-on-unhinged vocals, it becomes a gut punch of an album-ender. When he yelps out "rove to me/I'm not gonna die alone/Put your arm 'round my collarbone/Open the door...Don't lie to me/If you're putting the dog to sleep/That pet you just couldn't keep/Couldn't afford" you believe. You have to.

5. Pains of Being Pue in Heart - Belong
"In hospitals, in shopping malls..."

The song seems to be about an off-again/on-again relationship. The bridge (where this comes from) talks about all the places in the world where perfectly normal people do their thing - admitting that the object of the song is special while simultaneously seeming to confess that that fact just isn't enough. None of that matters, though, because there's dynamics at work which have been in short supply since the Smashing Pumpkins heyday.

4. Elbow - The Birds
"Looking back is for the birds"

Guy Garvey knows his way around an epic conclusion to an epic tune ("The Loneliness of a Tower Crane Driver", etc), but he outdoes himself with the conclusion to the 8 minute song "The Birds". The song has been building the entire time, but Garvey keeps it in check until without warning he brings it all back mid sentence.

3. Virtual Boy - Thrust
The string section makes an appearance

I mentioned on Monday that I don't quite 'get' dubstep. I might not be in the target audience, but I can still appreciate a big beat, and I'm an absolute sucker for a big beat combined with those cheesy fake string sections that were all the rage for a couple minutes a few years ago. "Thrust" pushes all those right buttons, but it makes you wait, stretching out the song, playing at what's ahead. Then right at the end, it bursts wide open, tacking on as much as it can. The string section almost seems over the top, but it fits right in.

2. TV on the Radio - Second Song
The glorious transition between the verse and the chorus

It's a fairly simple wordless vocalization, combined with a sort of melty swell to a ridiculously funky chorus, but there wasn't a single moment in music that made me smile the way this one did. There hasn't been one for a while. I sort of doubt there will be one for some time.

1. Cage the Elephant - Shake Me Down
"Even on a cloudy day"

While taking my brother back to the airport this summer, he played me "Shake Me Down" for the first time. It began as a fairly standard alt-rock song. Good enough, but nothing amazing. I was about to compliment him on his selection, but he raised a finger to silence me. "Just hold on for a moment", he said.

Then it hit. For a minute or so, the song went into hyper-epic mode, and everything aligned perfectly into a minute or so of rock perfection.

The song finished. "Whoa" was about the only thing I could think to say.

"Right??" he said with a smile.

Then he hit repeat.

Nibbishment

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